20 Seconds

1:46 am. Here at the old folks' house, waiting for the second meal of the day. My blood dude cooks us up something to relieve our stomachs from the pain it felt for the past ten hours. The living room smells like butter on the side, making my heartbeat go slower, making my mind journey through where the Sandman is.

I can't sleep yet; it's not yet time for me to retire.

Twenty seconds have passed. Time is now gradually decelerating. Vision's slowly experiencing an Intersect-like video-clip marathon. A second feels like a thousand memories replaying all over my head. Memories that have made me, broken me and rebuilt me, like in the movies, left me a mental scar. I was a constant state of flux... I hated it.

I was rash, irrational, erratic even. The world was my playground, and I loved it. I had tried to remove everything that pained me via forcing my way to a drunken stupor of reverse melancholy. I can't say whether it backfired or not, the effects were unnoticeable to the naked mind. How come most people cry it all out while I am unable to know what I am doing, yet still suffer the same effects of sorrow? Why?

Now out of nowhere, a cool breeze passed me by. It was nothing special, things like these get easily forgotten in a moment's time. But the moment I tried remembering how it felt, it made an impact... it got stuck in my head, and it felt good.

The forecast told me that a storm was arising just miles behind that cool breeze. I had to prepare. Darkness had spread to the skies. All that is visible are streaks of lightning, and the explosions of thunder. If I make it through this, would that cool summer breeze go back and stay for another moment?

I don't care how long it takes - bring it on. I might not have an umbrella, but all I need for today are my feet to keep me standing. I will hold onto the ground until it all ends, because I know in my heart, those small things that make you smile are all worth fighting for, even if it does get cold at times.

I tried to be someone else, but nothing seemed to change.

I finally found myself, fighting for a chance.

I know now, this is who I really am.